Shit, I might be able to feed ALL the kids this year . . . not just the ones I like.

I have another job interview for yet another adjunct faculty positon. I'm on a roll. I'm going to have amassed so many adjunct jobs by the time the summer is over . . . Wasn't there some old In Living Color sketch where family members argued over who had more jobs? That's kind of how it's going to feel.

I don't want to jinx myself but I'll have you know, dear reader, that I have NEVER been denied a job I've interviewed for. I'm not kidding. I'm not exaggerating. I have -- honest to God -- been offered every single job I have ever interviewed for. Including the ill-fated Fiber and Materials Department work-study job I took as a graduate student. (What? It was boring. I stopped showing up.)

Actually, here's a story: one day when I was "not showing up" for my Fiber and Materials Dept. job, cf and I were having coffee at Starbucks and I ran into my boss (who, unfortunately, is a bad bridge to burn as she's a famous artist) and startled, nervous I explained to my boss that I couldn't come into work because I had to "compile documents." Those were my exact words: "compile documents." I am an idiot. Cf and I still joke about that. Nothing like a little "document compiling" to get you out of obligations. Missed work? A wedding? A funeral? A bar mitzvah (not you, Mel Gibson)? The birth of your first child? Just say you were "compiling documents" and all will be forgiven. It makes you sound busy and important.

After watching the final episode of The Sopranos: Season 2 (I knew Pussy was gonna get whacked), I did some hard thinking about things like my MySpace account and this very blog. And I think that once I start teaching, they're both going to have to go.

The last thing I want is for my students to find me on MySpace and see all the absurd comments people leave for me and the absurd things I leave on MySpace. How can my students be expected to respect me when they see comments from my friends like: "No, I will not go to the National Egg Council Ball with you" and "How are you gonna get five kids?" or bs's posting of Gary Glitter's "Do You Wanna Touch Me" video (worse yet, the comments I leave for others) or that I wrote under the "Who I Want to Meet" section: alcoholic nuns, your mother.

The likelihood of students finding my blog is slim -- nevertheless, I'm not at my smartest, most articulate when blogging. Blogging is for fun. Blog is not overly thoughtful. Blog sometimes has grammar and punctuation errors . . .

I'm afraid this blog has about a month or so to live.

Currently listening to Yoko Ono's song "Don't Worry Kyoko" . . . baffling . . . slightly painful . . . and yet bluesy . . .

Last night at Trans-Mission, lw played this mash-up of Madonna and New Order she's been raving about --but she played it after I left. (It was an early night for me.) Therefore, I took it upon myself to find it and download it. It's called "Hung Up On a Blue Monday" -- dancey, listenable. Probably the best mash-up I've yet heard (which isn't saying much, as most mash-ups totally suck). Then again, it's kind of a miracle that a mash-up was able to make listenable what hasn't been listenable since 1986 -- yes, Madonna, I mean you.

Link of the day is highly disgusting and I hope ef, who is running wild in Guatemala, takes heed: THIS.